As the vibrant hues of autumn give way to the muted palette of winter, the world begins to slow. The crisp air carries the first hints of the season’s change, inviting us to retreat inward as nature prepares for its quiet transformation.
The chill in the winter air is invigorating, a crispness that sharpens the senses and awakens the spirit. It’s in this season that one can be most connected to the process of transformative alchemy, where reflection and reinvention become possible. For those who have lived in marginalized or liminal social spaces — constantly navigating different cultures, identities and expectations, winter’s quiet, whether marked by snowfall or the deepening chill, can become a powerful metaphor for the journey of self-discovery and belonging.
THE QUIET ALCHEMY OF WINTER REFLECTION
One favorite winter pastime for many is snuggling up in warm pants and a baggy sweater by the fireplace, with a mug of hot chocolate, watching a holiday movie or journaling — sometimes both. These cozy moments are essential to the alchemical process of self-renewal, offering space for reflection, introspection, and winter’s unique transformation. In much the same way, winter ushers us into a time of inner contemplation and reflection.
Often perceived as cold and bleak, it actually holds a mystical quality — a stillness that offers a profound opportunity for personal metamorphosis. Just as ancient alchemists sought to transform base metals into gold, the season’s quiet gives us the space to question the fixed ideas we’ve held about who we are and what defines us.
It’s a time to strip away the familiar and enter a period of disintegration and reintegration, much like the alchemical process itself. For those of us living in the in-between spaces — whether as Third Culture Kids, Military B.R.A.T.s, Third Culture Adults, immigrants, multiracial individuals or others with culturally fluid identities — winter is more than just a pause; it’s a chance to recalibrate, to blend the many aspects of our experiences into something uniquely our own.
A SEASON FOR DISINTEGRATION AND REINTEGRATION
Winter, often seen as a time of dormancy, is in fact a restorative season for contemplation and renewal — a time to turn inward and find the gold within the lead of our everyday experiences.
The invigorating chill of winter air serves as a reminder that, even in stillness, there is energy and life. For those of us living in the in-between spaces, this process is particularly vital, as we navigate the intricate task of embracing and honoring the rich complexities of culturally fluid identity and sense of self.
It’s a season to shed the layers of familiarity and confront the fixed identities that others may impose on us, prompting us to question how these external perceptions have influenced our understanding of who we truly are. Through this process of introspection, we navigate the complex duality between the expectations of others and our own inner desires, making space to embrace the gifts and challenges of cultural confluences.
Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. — Steve Jobs
This deconstruction of diverse, sometimes intersecting yet distinct elements of identity creates space for the emergence of a more authentic self. It conveys the nuance of holding multiple identities without forcing them into a single, unified narrative.
For those of us who are multiracial, multiethnic, and navigating multiple worlds, this process normalizes the complexity of our identity. It acknowledges that living as culturally fluid individuals brings both gifts and challenges — a journey rich with the potential for profound self-discovery. In the quiet of winter, we embrace this duality, recognizing that the complexities we navigate ultimately shape us into our truest, most multifaceted selves.
THE TRANSFORMATIVE ALCHEMY OF SELF-DISCOVERY
Winter’s quiet is not merely a pause but an invitation to delve deeper into the self, to unravel the complexities of our identities and reconstruct them in a way that honors who we truly are. Just as the cold air sharpens the senses and awakens the spirit, it also provides the stillness necessary to confront the echoes of our past.
TCK and Religious Trauma Expert Rebekah Drumsta was raised in a culture steeped in rigid traditions. She reflects, “I found myself carrying the weight of expectations that clashed with my growing sense of self. Each winter, the first crisp breeze signaled not just the change of season, but a return to the emotional turmoil of holidays that no longer resonated with me. The discomfort this brought into my home was palpable, affecting those I loved most.”
But winter’s alchemy showed her a different path: “Once I became a mother, each season presented new challenges as I deconstructed the religious or family traditions and culturally avoided traditions handed down to me.” Drumsta notes that winter was particularly challenging because she knew Christmas was coming — a season that was triggering and dysregulating.
“To be honest, my emotional and psychological discomfort made the holiday season bumpy for my family, as they never knew what would ignite my angst,” she says.
By learning to embrace the stillness and listen to her own needs, Drumsta began to dismantle those old traditions and echoes from her past, replacing them with ones that spoke to the unique fabric of her family. In doing so, winter transformed from a season of dread into a time of profound personal and familial renewal — a season where new growth could be nurtured under the blanket of snow, ready to emerge in the spring.
“Now, I can see winter as the blanket that covers my story to keep it safe, as below the surface, life, hope, and a strong future are being nurtured,” she says. “I get to choose my identity. Honoring my own journey also honors the journey of my ancestors and gives my daughter the freedom to be the alchemist of her own future too.”
This process of shedding and renewal is the heart of winter’s transformative power. It allows us to let go of what no longer serves us, to honor the journey of our ancestors, and to create space for new traditions that reflect our true selves. In this stillness, we find the alchemy that turns winter’s chill into the warmth of self-discovery and hope.
Check out Part 2 tomorrow to get tips for quiet winter reflection!
